![clipy erotic story clipy erotic story](https://i2-prod.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article5356108.ece/ALTERNATES/r250/clppy.jpg)
Everyone yearns to be naughty and do something they shouldn’t. From an early age, regarding paperclips and other office supplies, we are always told, “Don't fuck it!” Stories like Conquered By Clippy tap into that deep-seated desire to explore things that were never meant to be explored. LD: It’s not like living paperclips are inherently sexy. MH: Pretend I don’t get turned out by animated paperclips. As a writer, I do have to picture it in great detail, but I take no erotic pleasure in it. But when I write the sex scenes, my mind’s eye does not focus on his glowing metal poker of a schlong. I like Clippy-maybe I even love him-as a complex character in a deep and satisfying story. What does turn me on is a strong woman banging a paperclip.
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As a straight male who enjoys thinking about female humans, I would never be turned on by a male paperclip. MH: Do you find this stuff sexy? Are you personally aroused by Microsoft’s little helper? But a look through the reviews and “customers also bought” section reveals that yes, a lot of people bought my books because they truly wanted to crank their hogs, slam their clams, or snapple their fucknuggets. How many people are buying your books because they’re funny and stupid, and how many are buying them as fodder for actual masturbation? Wait, I mean parody? Whichever one is legal. Leonard Delaney: For legal reasons, yes, it is satire. Men's Health: This is a joke, right? This feels like a joke. He said yes, and then the magic happened. I contacted the author, Leonard Delaney-which is probably not his real name-and requested an interview. “I often imagined he was running an ice cube slowly down his curves or tucking clean sheets of paper between his folds.” “I was so lost and alone thinking I was the only one who got turned on each time the chime of Clippy's arrival rang through my speakers,” another wrote. “But by the end, I felt like I had been baptized in the sweet nectar of Clippy's love. “I purchased it with skepticism,” one reader reports. But if you like your literary BDSM with a touch of “What the fuck am I reading?”, you really can't do better than this 4000-word time-waster. Is Clippy the new Christian Grey? Probably not. We highly recommend that you do this.Ĭlippy is, of course, the helpful (and long-since retired) personal assistant for Microsoft Office users, the animated paper clip with googly eyes who popped up on our computer screens and asked unsolicited questions like “It looks like you're writing a letter. You can read it too, by going here and downloading it from Amazon, for less than what you'd pay for a Big Gulp. We've read it-in its entirety-and it's a thing of rare beauty. One of the latest stand-outs in this aggressively unique genre is Conquered By Clippy.
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They're real books, and they're actually for sale. They write books with titles like Cum For Bigfoot, Sex With My Husband's Anatomically Correct Robot, A Billionaire Dinosaur Forced Me Gay, and the epic-sounding Abraham Lincoln, Fuck Lord of the Moon. To find the truly creative and off-the-wall erotic fiction, you have to dig a little deeper into Amazon's e-book dungeons, to the self-published authors who may or may not be kidding. We're living in a golden age of weird erotica.Īnd no, we're most definitely not talking about Fifty Shades of Grey.